WITH FRIENDS LIKE THESE...

You know the rest...I don't need no enemies! Well, not really. Both of the guys I'm about to mention mean me no harm. Let me elaborate. 

I received two separate e-mails yesterday from guys I know. And exactly why they thought I would be interested or happy to read their correspondence eludes me.


E-mail #1 came from a friend who used to do what I used to do (sell ads for media outlets)...and in it, he divulged that an ex playmate of mine now has a webmaster...a reasonably professional site...and a visiting ad on Eros, all of which means she won't be calling me anymore to access my web acumen so I can access her you-know-what. 

I've been receiving annoying comments in the past two days from some guy who threatened me if I didn't remove every picture of this girl that has ever been on my site. And he actually found one from 6 months ago. Like...who in their right mind would give a shit about a free ad in the first place? Only a moron, that's who. I can only imagine the idiotic conversation during which this woman ranted and raved her self-absorbed nonsense at this guy who like me once upon a time, listened to her endlessly boring crap so he can hit the promised land. My review: The promised land? Pretty good. Whatever came out of her mouth? Minus one on the ten scale. Lethal!

E-mail #2 came from a second guy who enclosed something he read on the Internet about my most recent ex. In it, he described their sex life in vivid detail. Gadzooks! Why would I want to read about what I'm missing - even if I was the one who opted out? What's wrong with these guys?

But really...I thank them because it gave me something to write about today...and I don't really give a crap what these girls are doing. They both had (and I'm sure have) horrible things to say about me - as do I about them. Whatever!!

Moving on from the negative...I had a nice visit with DALIA (917-940-6248) yesterday. Because I'm nobody to impress, she greeted me at her door wearing what I could only describe as the washer woman's outfit...with no make-up on her face...and her hair pinned up. Quite an effect! Yet still...there was something compelling about the girl! The funny thing was...without the make-up and her hair pinned up, she almost looked like the twin sister of one of the ex's I just described. It was downright eerie! And then there was the inevitable comparison: DALIA doesn't have the legs of my ex...but those big, natural tits commanded my erection...err...I mean attention! The ex (on the other hand) had horrible fake breasts. I mean...like minus two on the ten scale. And she always said stuff like "my tits are getting bigger" whenever we had sex! As if! Honey! Let me give you a hint! Legs? Excellent. Arms? Excellent. Booty? Pretty good for a white girl. But tits? Sorry, totally busted! 

Anyway...I don't think I'll be attempting any deja vu's with DALIA regardless of how attractive I found her. Better to leave well enough alone! Whatevv...here's DALIA!